Welcome to Wilco Wednesday! If you are a new around these parts, “Wilco” is Army-speak for “Will Comply.” Think of it as saying “Roger, God. Got it. Will do.” So that is what Wednesday here at 7 Days Time is all about– exploring his decrees and seeking guidance for what complying with Him looks like in everyday life. The best part? He loves us for who we are, not what we do. Remember: He doesn’t want perfection, just obedience. Share. Enjoy. Interact. Welcome a very Godly, loving woman, my friend Bobbie.
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“God is moved by us. When He signed up for love, He signed up for pain.” ~Beth Moore
Remember as a child what it meant to “pinkie promise” or to agree with our lips with fingers crossed behind our backs? Some of us find it difficult to outgrow that practice. It may not be that easy for us in relationships to keep our commitments or to love another unconditionally and forever. In relationships with siblings, parents, relatives, friends, husbands, even adult children – we have made promises, but what happens when the thrill or ease of our “I promise” fades?
If love were an easy art or act, we would not be commanded and challenged repeatedly in Scripture to do it. Jesus says in John 15:12, “My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.” What hinders us from loving consistently and in increasing measure as we have said we would? The answers are as varied as are those of us who struggle with the kind of love to which we’ve been called.
-If I love with abandon, I will be hurt, betrayed, disappointed, even devastated. FEAR
-I have loved like that and have been burned. Self-preservation
-I think I could love like that if someone could love me the same. Reciprocity
-The feelings are gone, but I keep my word. Reputation
-He or she is not a good person, but too much is at stake to leave. Self-interest
– I made a mistake in choosing this person. I deserve to be happy. Entitlement
Whatever the motivation, the central obstacle to loving as Christ loved me is ME. What will I get, lose, risk, give, or be denied? When it becomes all about me and not about “the other,” loving with integrity for a lifetime is no longer the goal. Christ’s love for the Church and the individuals in it was motivated by a desire for the other’s good – No! The other’s best! He wants each of us to be at peace with the Father. His offering made it possible for us to see God, know God, be in relationship with Him, and live with Him forever.
Christ offered Himself in obedience to the Father’s desire. But what did it cost the Father? Everything! “God so loved the world that He gave…” The Father’s love held nothing back. It would involve some pain and loss, but ultimately, it would bring many sons and daughters to Himself. I am one of them, and so are you.
John writes, “Dear friends, since God loved us that much, we surely ought to love each other.” We surely should hold nothing back from our love. No longer: I love you when, I love you if, or I’ll love you until. Love never fails… It doesn’t quit!
Years ago I met a woman who had been married for 20 years. She was quite unhappy. When I inquired as to whether she thought she would leave him, she said, “No! I have children and a life. I’ll never leave.” I pointed out the obvious: Then learn to love him. Put in the effort. Hold nothing back.
If you are struggling to love someone you promised to love, consider this:
Submit your will to God’s will. It is about you- delighting in obeying your Savior. (John 14:15)
Ask God to make you a fruit-bearer in this area of love. (John 15:16)
Determine to be present. Be all in – nothing fake or pretentious. (Romans 12:9)
As children our pinkie promises were often “me-motivated” and tenuous, and the stakes were low. As daughters of God, we can- with the Spirit’s help- love like Jesus loved. No holding back. Much is at stake.
Sisters, how did this message resonate with you? Chime in and leave a comment.
***This blog is not intended to address the challenge of loving an angry or abusive person, who poses safety risks for self or children. Those matters require safety first and intervention.
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Writer, Editor, Consultant, and Conference Speaker, Bobbie Simpson is a seasoned high school English teacher, women’s Bible study teacher, parent of three adult children and grandparent of three.
Married 36 years to her husband Larry, a 27 year Air Force Officer , she credits the success of her marriage to the “cord of three, which is not easily broken.” Faith in Jesus Christ is the foundation that drives her passion for marriages that thrive, singleness with satisfaction, and parenting with purpose.
For the past seven years Bobbie has written and facilitated spouses’ and couples’ conferences for Spiritually Smart Family Conferences, a ministry that she and her husband founded under the auspices of Officer’s Christian Fellowship. Bobbie is ardent about the health and success of military marriages and homes.
Linking up today with my friend Kristin over at Three-word Wednesday and having a little Coffee for your Heart with Holley.
