Either Flat Daddy is a Baby Whisperer or aforementioned baby got up at 0449 today… You be the judge. Either way, I didn’t have to fight him to sleep at nap time!
“Go for a ruck march,” Flat Daddy said.
“You don’t need to weigh your ruck, just eyeball it,” he said.
“Pushing the stroller up the Franklin Mountain foothills near your house when rucking isn’t that hard,” he said.
“You will still be able to move during PWOC today,” he said.
In related news, Flat Daddy and I are not currently on speaking terms. #WebOfLies#ItBurns #MyLegs! #MyBack! #MyShoulders!#MyEverything!
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Milspouse musings: If these Tiny Humans are gonna do Fight Night, they need to let me know in advance so I can stock up on appetizers and sell tickets.
$5 cover includes all-you-can-eat refrigerator leftovers and choice of three types of cereal (Sorry, you must eat the cereal dry because I’m rationing the last quarter gallon until I can get to the store). It also includes one drink of likely stale wine.
On second thought… I will pay YOU to come to Fight Night, if you agree to be the referee.
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Deployment Log, Day 57:
1. If anyone is shopping for Christmas gifts for me this year, I’m a size make Korea not so many hours time difference.
2. Only 9 more days of this statistics class. Hopefully less if our group can get our act together and submit our final project.
3. On that note: one of our group members really came through for us and put together our final poster project. Sure, it was literally the only thing she has done all semester, but who cares– the draft is done and good quality! SO YAY!
4. Our sporadic and not-so-engaged/socially awkward prof gave us some feedback that we need to change some of our data for the final project… We’ve gotten all points so far, so the dude in my group that wants to be called “Reverend” said we shouldn’t worry about it. Buuutttt… I got all spiritual and was like “Yo, I can’t submit sub-par work,” with the idea that Jesus is watching we are working for the Lord and not men. I’m sure he is not pleased with me but oh well… Jesus IS watching and I want to do my best (even if it makes no sense and we aren’t really learning anything).
5. So I’ve already submitted my corrections to the group. We will see how this goes. #StatisticallySignificantlyAnnoying
6. Momming is so weird. It’s like a roller coaster. One minute I’m rocking Malick, trying to get him to settle down for nap. He’s sweetly smiling, I’m humming a Christmas carol…
7. Then he straight-up NAILS me right below the eye on the cheekbone with a Matchbox car. It left a mark. And is still throbbing.
8. Because I DO love Jesus, I did not curse. Although I did say very loudly my version of profanity: “GOD BLESS AMERICA MOTHER OF PEARL CHEESE AND CRACKERS!” Not kidding.
9. If you do cuss, it doesn’t mean you love Jesus less. We all have our things. Trust me.
10. Charis is figuring out how to manipulate the Blessing Box system. She gets upset about something (aka, Mama says no/puts her in timeout) and she sniffles and said, “I miss Daddy… Can I have Blessing Box?” #NOPE
11. Mamas, especially solo-deployment ones, should never be allowed to get sick. Thankfully, it was a short-lived stomach bug on Monday and both kids went to school. I slept a lot. And ate pretty much nothing.
12. And yes, I had my battle buddies on standby if things got out of hand with all things gross/sick mama. #GodBlessMyTribe
13. Prayer Requests: Again, better ability to connect with my husband for communication (even if it means me getting up at 4am once a week to chat), patience/energy for this homestretch of class, and ability to love on my babies when they are feeling blue (or, in Malick’s case, more violent than normal) #Ouch
14. Today’s parting thought:
“You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you.” ~Isaiah 26:3
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“It’s not officially a holiday celebration until a Tiny Human pukes.” ~Knoblochian Proverb
Thanks to our dear son to making sure that our Battalion’s Breakfast with Santa was an officially sanctioned holiday event! ?
PS: Malick is fine. As you know, my kids are pukers. And apparently, 2.5 hours of free-range grazing on marshmallows, a frosted sugar cookie, three pancakes, half a bottle of water and then trying to eat an entire sausage link (in one bite) will make a toddler gag and subsequently yak.
PSS: At least it was just on the floor and not near Santa’s lap. (Dodged a bullet there, Mr. Kringle…)
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Flat Daddy and our little Knobloch fam felt right at Ho-Ho-Home for the Holidays during our lovely 4th Battalion, 6th Infantry Regiment Breakfast with Santa event!
PS: Don’t worry. Malick waited till he was well away from Santa’s lap before he gagged on a sausage link and puked up about 85 mini marshmallows. ?
***
Oh man! Flat Daddy TOTALLY nailed it with this epic (albeit early) Christmas gift to this non-flat-mama/wife… A handheld Old School Oregon trail game!
If anyone needs me, I will be doing everything in my power to avoid dysentery and keep my friends from drowning in the Snake River.#FordCaulkOrFerry? #IShotABuffalo#ButCanOnlyCarry100lbsOfMe
PS: Is there ANYTHING more stressful than trying to float down the Dalles river without hitting a rock? I think not.
